


Ten Promises

by Shinocchi



Category: DRAMAtical Murder (Visual Novel), DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Canon Compliant, Condoms, Domestic Fluff, M/M, Plot Devices, Plot-Fill, Post-Canon, Pre-Canon, Ship Manifesto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-12
Updated: 2016-06-12
Packaged: 2018-07-14 16:15:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7179560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinocchi/pseuds/Shinocchi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ten promises Noiz made that had changed the entire of his life.</p>
<p>It's easy to make promises, but how many of them would one hold close to their hearts?<br/>And how many of them are actually life-changing?</p>
<p>A ship manifesto. Written in Noiz POV, a look into pre-canon, canon, post-canon of the ten promises that'd changed not only Noiz's life, but Aoba's as well.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ten Promises

**Author's Note:**

> This is my biggest contribution to Noiz's birthday ever. And also, this is a milestone fic and I thought it's finally time I write ship manifesto for this pairing having written about them for the past four years. This fic is The Fic that would hit my 1 Million Word mark of pure DMMd stories so it means terribly much to me :') 
> 
> By that, I'd like to thank all my readers, old and new, for reading my stories, supporting me and my stories, for leaving kudos and comments, and just... for everything you've done for me. Without you and your constant motivation, I wouldn't have achieved 1 million of works from just pure DMMd stories alone. Thank you so, so much! :')
> 
> Lastly, I hope you enjoy this story as much as I enjoyed writing it and also, as usual, kudos and comments are always much appreciated! <3

A promise – something that was given to him, robbed off him, and ultimately given back to him in due time. Promises were made out of false hopes, of fictitious words and of skeptical agreements that were used to merely disappoint him at the end of the day – that was what he had been telling himself for the entire time when promises after promises were thrown at him, expecting him to believe. He’d come to take promises as something not to be taken to heart – taking them seriously meant entrusting hope and that also meant giving others the perfect opportunity to crush him and he wouldn’t want to risk that.

So he decided not to believe in promises, not to believe in hope.

And only to believe in himself.

 

* * *

 

` _` “There’s a reason for your existence, please believe in that and promise me to just… **exist**.”` _ `

 

He already knew since young that his birthday was only a tool meant for phony courtesy. He was the main character of the day, sure, but most of the times, he’d find himself having to make up fake smiles after fake smiles at strangers who gave him more fake smiles that were a reflection of his own. The meaning of his birthday was completely different from what he was taught. But every year, he found himself looking forward to his birthday, crossing dates after dates off the calendar out of his own conscious. Because only on his birthday that he felt celebrated, that his existence wasn’t a complete failure and that his parents would give him pats on his head, compliments that he’d never get to hear a lot and at the end of the day, they’d shower him with promises after promises – gifts, more praises – that would effortlessly lighten his innocent heart up.

He never felt attached to his parents, but he’d always looked up to them, being the only people in this world he was ever close with. He took every one of their promises seriously, did as what they expected of him just so he could have them realize all the hopes they’d promised him.

He made wishes on his birthday, hoping for the simplest thing in the world yet he never said them out loud. Because those were the same promises his parents had made for him and he knew there wasn’t a need to repeat them again.

Yet, they never came true – none of his promises were fulfilled.

It was when his brother made his way into his life that he felt all the more pressured than he already did. His brother – Theo – was flawless; intelligent, good-looking, obedient, everything his parents were looking for. He was bright, cheerful and absolutely innocent, always following him around and intimating everything he was to do. He didn’t find it annoying at all; in fact, his brother’s existence had given him a new sense of hope that he’d never thought was possible. He thought he was all he had for the rest of his life and there was no need to hope for more.

But he was wrong – Theo existed, and he became half of him as he grew.

“Promise?” was the one word Theo had always hung by his mouth. He’d recite it whenever Noiz was to tell him off, either stopping him from doing something dangerous or something disobedient that he knew would earn scolding form his parents. Every time he was to do that he’d give his brother promises after promises that’d eventually had Theo making sure that he’d return the promises like how he’d expected from his parents.

“Promise,” he’d always respond, the weight lifted off his chest when a perky smile formed on his brother’s face.

He tried his best to fulfil every promise he gave his brother – the extra piece of almond cake, the bunny plushie he’d kept with him for the longest time, a simple hug, or a simple stroll around the garden – and the last thing he ever wanted to see was the let-down on brother’s face and he didn’t want to see his own reflection on his brother simply because he thought his brother deserved none of those.

He tried his best, he really did.

But there was _one yet most important promise_ that he’d never come to realize for his brother – the one that his brother had requested of him to contact him whenever he could when he escaped from home, simply because his parents could no longer fulfil _their_ promises to him.

 

* * *

 

_` “There are more to this world than the root where you belonged. Promise me to stay strong and to survive – until you found a **reason** to live.”` _

 

He didn’t know much about Midorijima when he decided to take a sail towards the place. All that he knew was that it was obscured enough to keep him out of sight – specifically out of people he never wanted to acquaint with again. There was a reason for his escape and he didn’t want to look back. He’d thrown all his pride, hope, _promises_ that were showered upon him by one side and he’d decided that leaving where he was labelled meant an opportunity for him to be reborn.

When he first set foot in Midorijima, the drastic difference caught him off guard. He’d learned about this place, but being here, physically, by himself, was a level too different for him to comprehend. The atmosphere was nothing like what he’d experienced before. The town was a foreign place for him – it was a collection of buildings, it was a city of haves and haves not. He saw new things with his own eyes, spotted familiar elements in corners, the flickering between affluence and poverty a sight too distinct for him to miss. People around him were nothing like what he’d seen before but he adapted fast, nevertheless. He’d only have one conception towards humans in general anyway, and regardless of who they were and where they were from, nothing would change the fact of how _selfish_ human beings typically were.

He could hardly trust anyone, even when someone was to give him the ‘this is great’ promise when he looked out for an AllMate. How great is great? How does one define great? So he ended up defining his own ‘great’ by building his own AllMate from scratch, perceiving it to be the best and closest _tool_ he could ever equip himself with.

“P!”

The first sound his AllMate made was nothing like what he’d imagined it to be. It was a bit too high-pitched, aching his ear when he turned it on. But before he could adjust the setting in it, it spoke again, halting every one of his intention:

“Noise! Noise!”

Noise… huh? he thought to himself, then letting out a small chuckle that was intended for himself.

“Noise…” he repeated the word under his breath. In the far distance, the silhouette of the skyline pierced through the warm glow like a jagged mountain ridge; the hustle and bustle outside of his apartment’s window never seemed to have come to a halt. The noises on the pathways engulfed him, distracting his thought process, rendering unnecessary conclusion into his head. The green-cubed AllMate jumped animatedly on the table, squeaking, smearing garish voices across the once-silence room. It wasn’t a sound he hated, he’d been surrounded by solitude for too long. And when the AllMate hopped happily onto his window sill, it started talking to Noiz, asking him about the shop opposite their apartment, about that one food stall down the street, about things Noiz never knew.

It was a new sort of noise he knew that would accompany him from then on. So he settled his mind, letting it fall into a deep abyss of peace before he muttered again,

“Noise.”

It reminded him of himself – the unwanted static in the family, tainting the name of his oh-so prominent parents. And perhaps, if he was to switch an identity, this could be what he could aim for then. This time, he promised himself to live up to the name; his new deserving identity.

 

* * *

 

_` “If you could promise yourself to be stronger, than you could promise yourself to figure out what **strong** really means too.”` _

 

He never knew about Rhyme, but he knew that it was one of the first things that’d enticed him the moment he set foot into this place. He knew it was a game; but what triggered his interest was that it wasn’t physical and it was meant to challenge the brain. Good. He wouldn’t mind physical but it reminded him of memories he didn’t want to be reminded of and there was no fun in not being to feel anything anyway.

When he looked up about the game, every ounce of his interest increased with every new information he obtained. Ultimately, he found himself searching for the best way to play the game, realizing that the game would play him instead if he didn’t find a way to break the rules. He was a great, fast learner; and it didn’t take him long to figure out how to work the game either.

His first game was reckless. He tried the strategy he planned, noticing that not everything was going with his plan and then he decided to beat around the bush, dragging time, waiting for Usagimodoki to figure a safe way out just to find himself being cornered.

“Tch,” was all he released upon realizing how close to defeat he was. ‘Defeat’ – a word he despised. With a deep frown on his face, he summoned a panic-looking Usagimodoki, hushed a few quick words at it then straightened himself up to face his opponent again, who was wearing a sly smirk alongside his cat-type AllMate.

“Surrendering?” he called from afar, only to be responded by Noiz’s very own smirk.

“You’re ten years too early to beat me,” he said, even though he didn’t say it loud enough for the man to hear. But Usagimodoki had launched themselves towards the man before he could say anything, catching him off guard as he quickly summoned a barrier, just to find two Usagimodoki sneaking right to his back while his focus stayed up front, then giving him a fatal hit from the back.

“That’s cheating!” the man roared, but Noiz’s smirk only deepened.

“It’s called a strategy,” he said, completely nonchalant.

Humans are too easy to read, he concluded. When you give them the sun, they’ll think that they’d owned the world. And when you give them darkness, they’d think that everything is hopeless and that the only solution is to surrender – just like what this man was doing.

It was boring. If every one of his opponent happened to act this way, there was no way he could enjoy this game as much as he wanted to. He kept the Rhyme field away, had Usagimodoki hopping onto his shoulder before he slipped his hands into his pants pockets, preparing to make his way out.

“Hey!”

He walked, without caring of whatever that was happening around him. He couldn’t care less about those spectators; all they wanted was entertainment anyway and Noiz had no obligation to give it to them.

“Hey, bro!”

He halted. It’s becoming way too annoying for him to endure.

“I see you’ve been pretty great just now.”

He turned around to see a man grinning at him, a gesture that told him that he’s up to no good.

“What do you want?” he snapped, tone cold.

“Ah, well, calm down,” the man laughed an awkward smile. “Am just wondering if you’re interested to join our team? Or more like…” he paused, lifting an uglier smile that had Noiz frown deeper. “…to form a team with us?”

Noiz looked at him, questions all over his face.

“We’re looking at forming a Rhyme team and we’re looking out for strong players,” the man explained. “You did pretty well back there, so we thought—“

He didn’t’ hear the rest of the man’s words. He’d made himself clear anyway – he was looking for strong players so that he could use them to beat others. As he thought, people around him only approached him for either his money or his body, or in this case, his strength.

But being in a team meant being able to attract troubles and being able to attract troubles also meant that the possibility of him being able to attract stronger opponents would be higher over if he was to hunt one by himself.

He couldn’t care less about what the man was trying to sell him so before he could even finish his words, he nodded, waving a hand to stop him from continuing.

“Deal.”

“Seriously?” the man exclaimed, then holding out a hand. “Welcome come to ‘Ruff Rabbit’!”

As he took the man’s hand, he soon come to realize that this wasn’t merely finding a new team to be part of, but it was also finding one of the strongest opponents he’d want to defeat –

\-- _SlyBlue_.

If he was to end his involvement in this game sooner or later, at the very least, he’d want to defeat _SlyBlue_ first –

\-- that was the _promise_ he’d made for himself.

 

* * *

  

_` “Because you promised to be strong so that you could survive. How about you figure out how to be the **strongest** so there’s no longer anything to fear anymore?”` _

He never felt belonged in the team, even though he was technically part of it. He had his own motives and he knew that the team had theirs as well. He never wanted to dwell too much into the technicalities of how a ‘team’ worked, their silent, mutual agreement being to let the other be as long as they didn’t get into the way of what other team members were doing. He had to admit that his information web had expanded since then, which was a great help for him in search of _SlyBlue_.

And it didn’t take too long for him to finally locate him, even though the first impression of the so-called strongest player in history was far from what he’d expected.

“Hello! This is Junk Shop Heibon! May I help you?”

He hitched a breath, for reasons unknown. This person sounded _nothing_ like _SlyBlue_ and he thought he’d gotten the wrong person at first. Completely perplexed, he said nothing, merely listening to the multiple ‘Hello?’ from over the phone until the other person hung the call that he released an unintended sigh.

Was this person really _SlyBlue_? he thought. He brought up the hologram screen containing _SlyBlue_ ’s information again, reading the name ‘Seragaki Aoba’ for a few times before a thin frown appeared in between his eyebrows.

There was no way he’d gotten the wrong person. Maybe this person was simply not as he thought he’d be. Maybe he was overestimating him.

He couldn’t be sure – and there was only one way to find out.

The plan wasn’t too hard to execute either. Aoba seemed to be an easy prey and before he knew it, he was out of the shop, pacing towards the trap Noiz had conveniently set for him and in a blink of an eye, they were in the Rhyme field Noiz was already more than familiar with, watching as the other man looked around, with his AllMate by his side, visibly confused.

“ _This time, it is such an honour,_ ” – something wasn’t quite right with this situation but he couldn’t pinpoint exactly what was happening, which was frustrating on its own – “ _So, let’s play a game, shall we?_ ”

If he was going to fight the strongest man in town then he might as well make it interesting. He’d heard how obsessed _SlyBlue_ was with thrills, with strong opponents, perhaps on a level similar to him. He was hoping to see a menacing man, one that would lift a similar smirk as he did and one that would give him a glare as emotionless and as sharp as his. But he saw none of those in this very man he was facing. Instead, he saw a pair of determined yet _strong_ light-brown gaze, a definition of _strong_ that he had never known. He saw how he was clumsy in his instructions, yet vibrating a sturdy sense of willpower that told Noiz enough that he’d never go down without a fight.

He was _nothing_ like what Noiz had imagined him to be. But better.

He clicked his tongue. This man was distracting his thoughts and there was no way he could let him do it.

“Finish him,” he ordered briefly, responded with a high-pitched “Roger!” and was about to turn his back before the very same high-pitched voice rang in absolute terror.

“Danger! Danger!”

He returned his gaze to the man before him, one that he assumed was knocked out cold, and instantly felt cold sweat running down his spine.

Standing right before him was _everything_ he’d expected _SlyBlue_ to be – menacing, blazing golden pair of eyes giving out an aura so penetrating Noiz felt as if he was being analysed from the inside out. His smirk was nothing of what Noiz remembered of himself: it was filled with tease, and an obvious hint of _laughing_ at Noiz. It made Noiz feel pathetic. He’d never felt _this_ mortified ever since he set foot in Midorijima.

The next thing happened so fast he could barely register. When he regained control of his own Rhyme field, he found himself defeated, his Rhyme field gradually collapsing, the last thing he remembered being _SlyBlue_ ’s menacing grin.

And while he retreated, heading back for a better strategy, he _promised_ himself that he’d hunt him down, and demand for a rematch.

Because there was absolutely _no way_ he’d allow someone else to toy with him – not in this way.

 

* * *

  

_` “Perhaps not everything works the same as you assumed them to be after all. How about you make a promise to figure out how **Seragaki Aoba** works?”` _

 

All he ever wanted was a rematch with _SlyBlue_. There was no way he’d accept the mortification he’d just given him; just like that. He’d do _anything_ for a rematch. It wasn’t the fact that he’d lost that had hit him hard, but it was the fact that he didn’t know _why_ he lost that was frustrating him. He never liked the unknowns and having someone to defeat him in such a single-handed way wasn’t something his pride could sustain.

He took his investigation into another level, looking into Aoba’s background and into Aoba’s lifestyle. He knew this was beyond surface investigation – this was a sort of obsession he never knew he could possess and he couldn’t handle how someone could crush his belief, his composure, in such a… _simple_ way.

He needed answers and he knew that he could only seek it from the very person who’d made him feel this way. Perhaps if he wouldn’t talk, he could seek for another solution then.

His eyes brightened.

He’d known Seragaki Aoba like the back of his hands. He knew where he worked, where he lived, what he did on a daily basis. Sneaking into his room wasn’t too much of a trouble. The lock was an easy break, and the moment he stepped into Seragaki Aoba’s room, he looked around, searching for the one thing that could give him a clue, and ultimately settled his eyes on the old-modal computer in one corner.

A small smile lifted on the corners of his lips. There were too many unpredictable things about Seragaki Aoba that had often caught him off guard. Who would use such an old modal computer nowadays? What was wrong with the man? He couldn’t understand Seragaki Aoba at all and the intensity of wanting to find him out only increased with every passing second, every ounce of information he’d obtained about the man.

“Hmmm…” he hummed under his breath, the sound of his typing on the keyboard the only sound in the room. He understood _nothing_ of what he was reading on the monitor, just like he knew _nothing_ of Seragaki Aoba, even though he thought he’d memorize him from the inside out.

“Oi! What are you doing here?”

Being way too mesmerized by the sight in front of him, he merely flinched when he heard the sound of door opening, followed by a loud shriek.

“Welcome home,” he said, emotionless. Well, great. Now that the person himself is here, might as well ask him directly. He pointed at the screen, still trying to decipher the foreign codes flashing past it. “What is the matter with this? I cannot understand anything of this.

Seragaki Aoba, however, didn’t seem like he had any intention to answer him as he stormed his way towards him, glaring at him.

“This is trespassing, you know?” he hissed, only urging Noiz to stand up and face him, all upfront.

“You really have no idea who I am?” he asked, slightly amused at how slow this person could be.

“Huh?”

His reaction was nothing of what Noiz had expected. Letting out a low sigh, he raised a tiny plush of his AllMate right at Aoba’s face, then lifting a smirk when he saw Aoba’s eyes brightened.

“Remember now?”

“Y-you are that—“

“Now tell me how did you defeat me.” He wasn’t here for a sweet reunion. He only wanted an _answer_.

“I… defeated you?”

He scowled. Is this man for real?

“Don’t act dumb. You defeated me, with that AllMate of yours,” he said, voice low, pointing at the blue-furred dog by Aoba’s feet as he spoke.

“What? Are you serious?”

His patience was running out and he felt his temper raising with every passing second. Taking a step towards Aoba, he grabbed him by the collar, pressed him against the wall and literally growled into his face.

“Don’t use this on me. If you don’t tell me, I’ll take away what’s important for you.”

“W-wait a minute, I—“

He never thought he’d met a man as stubborn as he was. Clicking his tongue, he released Aoba, then grabbing the blue-furred dog, holding him on the collar while he struggled.

“Let Ren go!” Aoba demanded, fury evident on his face.

“Tell me how you defeated me then.”

“I don’t know! I didn’t even know I defeated you.”

As Aoba lurched towards him, he released Ren, grasping Aoba on the wrist instead and pressed him against the wall once again, the grip on his hand tightening, threatening to break it.

“You can still play Rhyme with one hand,” he whispered right into Aoba’s ear. “Fight me in Rhyme again.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Aoba struggled through panted voice. “I don’t remember anything.”

Now his patience was _really_ running thin. He was serious about breaking his arm, and he was sure that he’d have done exactly that if they weren’t interrupted by more foreign members that Noiz wanted absolutely nothing to do with.

Seragaki Aoba was unpredictable; he knew _nothing_ about the man. He didn’t know why he made him stay despite his threat to break his limb. He didn’t know why he was so persistent in being nice to him even though he’d come to know that Noiz was the one who’d forced him into a Rhyme match,

And he didn’t know why the donuts Seragaki Aoba gave him could taste so addicting.

Seragaki Aoba had ruined his flow of life. There was absolutely no way he could allow this. And there was absolutely no way he could let this man slip before he figured him out – that was yet another _promise_ he gave himself.

 

* * *

  

_` “The world is not as bad as you think it is; promise me that you would allow me to show you more of this **world**.”` _

And then again, Seragaki Aoba gave him more surprises that he’d never anticipated. All he ever wanted was a rematch but the more involved he was with Seragaki Aoba, the more he realized that he was dragged into _his_ flow instead. There were a lot of things about Seragaki Aoba that he never knew, even though he thought that he’d known everything. But then the matter of Toue came in, the matter of Scrap, and a whole bunch of other matters that were none of his concern. He could simply ignore them all and let Seragaki Aoba be until he was done with it that he could return for their rematch. But instead, Seragaki Aoba asked for _his_ help, and it still puzzled him to this date of why he’d agreed to help in the first place.

Maybe it was because of the promise – the _one promise_ that Seragaki Aoba had given him that told him that he’d do whatever he could if he was to help him. Maybe that was the bait he was caught upon.

But he couldn’t trust Seragaki Aoba completely. He was a no one – only an opponent, and he’d laugh at himself if he was to trust an opponent just like that.

So when he agreed, it was a mere silent promise he made to himself to keep an eye on Seragaki Aoba, to make sure that he won’t escape without fulfilling his promise first. He didn’t know how it happened but before he knew it, there was this small hint of fear that was budding within him, taking away his rational mind, replaced it with edginess when it came to Seragaki Aoba and he wanted nothing but to put an end to this.

Seragaki Aoba disrupted his life flow and he’d never forgive him for it.

But then, one thing led to another; he was dragged into situations that he’d never wanted to be in, alongside company that he knew he’d never be able to mix well with. Yet, he never wanted to lose sight of Aoba – chasing after him wherever he was to go, making sure that he stayed within his proximity, within the space where Noiz could catch sight of him. This was beyond the level of being stubborn, he soon realized. This was a form of _obsession_ and it was too late for him to pull himself out.

He was confused of his own emotions. Seragaki Aoba was a _no one_. He was simply his _opponent_ and it should remain as that.

But when Aoba insisted to take care of his wounds, insisted to keep him out of trouble, insisted to lecture him on things he thought were useless advices, he started to wonder if _Aoba_ was more than just a _no one_ , after all.

He observed every one of his reaction – from when Aoba would angrily reprimand him for hurting himself, to when Aoba succumbed to the desire trap he created, the small hint of flush that appeared on his skin, the way hint of tears gathered on the corners of his eyes. He could feel _none_ of his skin when he touched him but he could feel something _inside_ that’d made all the difference.

_Aoba_ wasn’t a _no one_. But what he was – he had no answer to it.

He didn’t need to take too long to figure out his answer anyhow. When Aoba protected him from the laser emitted from the ferocious dog-type AllMate in the tower, he felt this… indescribable anger, anxiety, emotions that he never knew he’d possessed from beneath his chest. He was furious at Aoba, even though he didn’t know why. He exploded at him, asking him questions after questions of _why_ Aoba would go to the extent for him? He needed answers; he needed them to make himself feel better – to soothe this tight, suffocating emotions within him.

But all Aoba could throw at him were words that he thought he’d never hear from someone else ever again – “I don’t want you to die”, “I care about you” – and even though he questioned Aoba again, all he did was repeat the same answers, perplexing Noiz, but touching him all at the same time.

He didn’t know what he was feeling, but it wasn’t something bad, and he didn’t want it to end. It made him feel wanted, _belonged_ ; something he’d casted aside since he left home.

“There’s only one thing I can teach you – that the world isn’t all the bad after all,” Aoba had told him. It sounded surreal, unbelievable; a belief he’d stopped believing in ever since he acknowledged the fate he was being thrown into.

“Can you teach me about the world then?” He didn’t even know why he said it, but it was the first time in a long time that he’d spilled his thoughts out from his chest, totally uncensored and he wanted to believe that this was what he genuinely wanted.

“Hm? Of course.”

It was a promise Aoba made for him – a promise that meant a lot more than any other promise Aoba had given him, even the one where he’d made him promise him to have a rematch with him. He could only lift a smile at the thought, laughing at how ironic this whole situation was: him, being someone who’d decided not to take promises seriously, someone who’d dropped faith in others, was now hoping with all his might to hold _Aoba_ ’s promise close to his heart.

If Aoba was going to promise him, then he might as well honour it. If Aoba was to see him as a _person_ , then…

When he kissed Aoba softly on the lips, he took glee in the flustered yet surprised face of Aoba. A weight was lifted off his chest; one that he never knew existed. He wanted to claim this man, to tell this man with the very limited way of expression he’d come to know that he wanted him to be exclusively his for the rest of his life. He couldn’t spell them out with words yet, but he could express them with actions, gestures that he was more than familiar with – and he wished Aoba knew that the kiss he’d given him before he sprinted out of their hiding place was more than just a tease, or a mere kiss:

It was a _promise_ he gave Aoba, in exchange with the _promise_ Aoba had given him.

 

* * *

  

_` “You promised to trust him, and now, promise yourself to do the one thing you know you always **need to do**.”` _

 

He wasn’t all that certain of his feelings but the fact that he’d lurched forward and protected Aoba under the heavy debris had given him all the answers he needed. His mind might be confused, his emotions might be wavering, but his instincts were honest and the moment he felt the crushing pain running all over his body, he knew that this wasn’t a decision he would regret.

“N-Noiz…?!”

Aoba stared at him from below him with utter shock on his face. His body was driven with menacing pain, every ounce of energy slipped out of him with every passing second but he wore a smirk on his face, one that was elicited out of his own conscious, as he threw Aoba a smile that had Aoba hitching a breath.

“Noiz!”

It hurts. Every part of his body hurt. He’d wanted to feel pain for the rest of his life but he’d never felt pain so intense like this and he swore he almost blacked out if he hadn’t been clinging onto Aoba’s warmth against his skin when Aoba embraced him, his voice anxious, his expression equally so.

“Noiz, stay with me!” he cried out.

“Hurts…” he muttered. He tried to lift an arm but it was no use. His bones were crushed and all that he could do was stare at Aoba as the other looked around anxiously.

“Just… endure this for a bit more.”

Aoba’s embrace was warm; it was the first thought that’d flashed past his head when Aoba carried him and ran with all his might. He could hear Aoba’s rapid heartbeats as he ran, he could feel his sweat dropping on his skin as he panted, he could feel Aoba _so well_ that he felt like a dream. _He_ was the one who’d promised him that he’d figure out a way if anything was to happen to Aoba after Scrap, but now, _Aoba_ was the one looking out for him, when he was so physically disabled and all that he could rely on was Aoba.

How much more did he need to do for Aoba until he could repay him for everything he’d done for him? And how many promises did he need to give Aoba to tell him how important he was to him? His thoughts were disarray, but he was sure that even until they made their way out of the crumbling tower, right to when he lost his consciousness, the only thought that was in his mind was all the promises he wanted to give Aoba, just so he could keep him by his side.

 

The next time he woke up, all he could see was white, and it took him a few seconds to finally comprehend where he was. He looked around: the walls were simply cream, no decorations bear against it, with a brown-framed window near to where he laid. He matched his breathing with the beeping of the machines surrounding the bed, barely able to move, his limbs numb, his heartbeats the only indication of him still being alive. He turned with great difficulty towards the other side of the bed, a smile curved reflexively on his mien when he caught sight of the person laying by his side.

He wanted so much to lift a finger just so he could feel more of that addictive warmth that was the last thing he remembered before he passed out. Aoba was _right there_ , sleeping soundlessly, his breathing stable and light. His skin illuminated the brightness of the sunlight pouring into the room, his eyelashes long and his hair a silky wave of gradient blue, its strands scattered on the white sheet of Noiz’s bed.

He tried lifting his hand again, driven by the raw urge to touch Aoba just to have Aoba flinching for a mild moment before he raised his head, meeting Noiz’s eyes.

“Yo,” Noiz said, the smile still plastered on his face.

“N-Noiz…” Aoba said, seemingly unable to believe that Noiz was now awake. “Y-you’re awake.”

“I am,” Noiz responded, voice hoarse.

“How are you feeling?” Aoba’s tone had raised an octave. Standing up, he observed the bandages on Noiz’s body, sweeping his fine blond hairs on his forehead aside to feel his skin.

“Hurts,” Noiz said, sentence short.

“I… I’ll get the doct—“

“Wait.” He couldn’t move, he only had his voice to support him. But it seemed to be more than enough for Aoba as he halted, looking Noiz in the eyes once again.

“Please stay here for a while more.”

He’d never imagined himself to say something like this in his entire life. But he needed to make sure – to confirm that this is _Aoba_ right in front of him, that he’s real and that everything’s over and that now they were in each other’s presence in peace.

Aoba said nothing. Merely gracing a tender smile, he sat, placing his hand on top of Noiz’s and caressed the back of it with his palm.

“Thank you for coming back to me,” he whispered, breaking the serene solitude in the room.

But that was what Noiz wanted to say – and he wished the smile he gave him as a response was enough to transmit that very message to him.

 

It took a few days of silent meditation, torturing hours of waiting for Noiz to finally make up his mind. All that was in his thoughts were his own emotions, desperately trying to find a definition to describe how he felt but every other speculation resulted in one and only one conclusion: that he was in love with Aoba. There was no other explanation to these feelings. He didn’t know exactly when did he fall for Aoba but he was sure that he never wanted Aoba to leave, the thought alone agonizing and suffocating. So when Aoba returned his feelings when he finally brought enough courage to confess, he experienced another wave of indescribable emotions and all that he wanted to do was to _feel_ Aoba, to _touch_ him, now that he could finally feel sensations, just to make sure that the warmth he’d experienced in the Tower when Aoba carried him, the warmth that had rolled into his heart when Aoba promised to teach him the world, and the warmth that he’d felt from Aoba’s words alone weren’t an illusion. He wanted to believe that Aoba was real and he’d never expected the heat that came after, physically, could be so agonizingly amazing.

Sex was never something he enjoyed; he’d seen it as a physiological need and that was all. But _Aoba_ proved him wrong – it was more than just physical connection but it was also when Noiz felt himself pulsing _inside_ Aoba that had told him that they were connected emotionally as well. He thought he felt Aoba’s emotions simply from the thrusts he’d come to impatiently handle, and the way Aoba muttered his name had given him a sort of overwhelming sensations that had swept all his mind off his feet.

He’d never known how having sex could feel so gratifying, and Aoba was the person who had told him that.

 

Even when he was discharged from the hospital, Aoba continued treating him as if he was part of his family, bringing him home for meals, walking him around town, spending time together with him. Their life seemed to have fallen back into track – to the peaceful life of Midorijima like they once yearned for. But somewhere in Noiz’s mind, he knew that this wasn’t enough. A prick that he thought he’d long forgotten was buried deep in his heart, surfacing and becoming more prominent ever since he regained his sensations and deep inside, he knew that it was only a matter of time before he needed to face the problems he’d selfishly left behind. He never felt a need to; never felt a reason to.

But now, Aoba was his reason and he’d never found courage so huge before to face this until now.

“What are you thinking about?”

Aoba waved a hand in front of his face, breaking his train of thoughts. He wasn’t sure if he already had the best decision for both of them and he needed another push – one that only Aoba could give him.

He smiled. Pulling Aoba over by the waist, he leaned towards him, nuzzling his lips against Aoba’s cheek before he pulled on the other’s shirt.

“W-wait, are we doing this now?” Aoba panted, pushing against Noiz’s chest.

They were in Noiz’s apartment and it was almost nightfall now. Aoba had found himself spending more time in Noiz’s apartment since his discharge, attempting to learn more about Noiz and frequently spending the night as well when things got heated up.

“You don’t want to?” Noiz whispered hotly, flicking his tongue piercing against the shell of Aoba’s ear.

“I-it’s not that. We called for pizza delivery, remember? It should be coming over soon.”

Well, it’d be really mood-spoiling if the delivery man was to arrive when they had their tongues over each other, though.

Sighing softly, Noiz picked up his Coil, made a quick call then returned to Aoba.

“I requested for them to come an hour later. Now there’s nothing to worry anymore.”

“Seriously, you…” Aoba chuckled.

He’d never get enough of Aoba. The sensation of Aoba’s skin against his own was too surreal for him to adapt to. He’d never felt another’s skin in such a fervid way and with Aoba’s endearing expression adding onto the bucket list of arousal, he found his patience running lower and lower with every passing minute in Aoba’s presence.

“Noiz…”

The couch was too small to fit two grown-up men but it was more than enough for Noiz to envelope the whole of Aoba’s body into his arms. With their chests pressed against each other, he could clearly feel Aoba’s heart beating against his, clearly feel Aoba’s hot breath against his neck when he lifted his torso just slightly up to kiss Noiz on the neck.

Their lovemaking was nothing like how they’d done it the first time in Glitter. It was more passionate, desperate, and it felt like a competition between them to see who can make the other come first.

“I was thinking…” Aoba breathed, with one of Noiz’s hands pumping on his dick and another twirling his nipple. “… that now since you’ve recovered completely… Do you… ah… want to have the rematch soon?”

Noiz stopped, but only just momentarily, before he pressed his lips against the side of Aoba’s neck, licking a wet trail from the back of his ear all the way down to his collarbone.

“Tomorrow?” he said at long last, elevating a heated pair of eyes to catch sight of Aoba’s flustered cheeks.

Aoba nodded with a smile. Then, he cupped Noiz’s face, kissing him on the forehead, then his eyelid, then his piercings – the ones on his ears, the ones on the bridge of his nose, on his eyebrow, and under his lips – before he thrust his tongue into Noiz’s mouth, sucking hungrily on his tongue.

“I won’t go easy on you this time,” he chuckled, one that was quickly replaced by a soft moan when Noiz pushed a finger into him.

“Me neither,” Noiz breathed profoundly, impatience evident when he pressed a second digit alongside the first.

“W-wait,” Aoba panted, struggling and stretching a hand to find the pocket of his jacket on his floor when Noiz positioned the head of his dick against his all-prepared hole. “This.”

A condom was presented in front of Noiz’s face, causing Noiz to let out a light laugh.

“How about you put it on for me?”

Aoba nodded without a word. For a few minutes, all that they could hear was the sound of Aoba tearing the aluminium foil apart, and when he sat up, he hesitated, putting the condom into his mouth instead then bringing Noiz’s dick right into his mouth.

“Heh, you’ve become skilled with this, I see,” Noiz teased, although the breathlessness in his voice was not any convincing.

He held onto Aoba’s shoulder as Aoba blew him, pushing his dick in and out of his mouth, as if to ensure that the condom was tightly intact.

“It’s… enough,” Noiz gritted. Any more and he was sure to come and this was definitely not how he’d want to achieve orgasm, not when Aoba was presenting himself so openly to him like that.

Aoba released his dick with a loud pop then. Smirking, he pulled his legs up, exposing his hole at Noiz’s direction and looked away.

“G-go on.”

Noiz didn’t need to be told twice. His thrust was clearly impatient, rough, and was intended to bring himself to the hilt with one push.

Sex had never felt so amazing in his entire life. And while he was connected in such a feverish way with Aoba, both their conscious melting and becoming one with each other, it was when he finally set his mind into place, making the one _promise_ for himself –

\-- and for Aoba.

 

* * *

 

_` “I promise to **take care** of him, and in turn, he promised to take care of me as well.”` _

It took great courage to address the feelings one held within them. And it took greater courage to take the right step in making things work. Noiz wouldn’t say that he held the best confidence in the world but he wouldn’t say that he wouldn’t attempt to make things right either. The matters between himself and his family had been a fatal prick in his heart for the longest time he could remember. He had absolutely no intention to return to who he once was, at least he didn’t find the reason to. But settling things with his family wasn’t returning to becoming the son they wanted him to be. Rather, it was returning to being a person better than he used to be – one who never escaped from responsibility and one who took actual steps to solve problems.

He never told Aoba about his family; he didn’t have the opportunity to. But he could already hear what Aoba would tell him if he was to tell him about it, and he thought, perhaps this was the perfect chance for him to prove to Aoba, to his family, and more importantly, to himself that escaping was no longer an option, especially not when now the responsibility was no longer his own but of Aoba.

Midorijima wasn’t a bad place to reside in but it was definitely not the best. Germany wasn’t the best place to reside in either, but was definitely better. He wouldn’t make it a compulsory option and he wanted to respect Aoba’s decision but before he could make that very step to invite Aoba over to his hometown, to start a new life and to invite Aoba into _his_ life after having Aoba showing his own, he needed to pave a smooth path for him first.

The decision to return to Germany wasn’t impulsive. Weeks had been spent in contemplation, hours had been spent in weighing the pros and cons and at the end of the day, it was their rematch that had given him the answer.

He didn’t know how to tell Aoba about it and he didn’t want Aoba to deal with the ugly side of things either. He’d rather entrust his faith in Aoba, believing that Aoba would wait for him, and departed without a word.

…which he regretted greatly after that.

“Where have you been?” was Aoba’s first words upon seeing him, three months after his soundless separation. He had a lot of things he wanted to tell Aoba, but seeing his face alone – the expression he was so familiar with, his features, everything – punched a terrible hit against his chest and chased all the intentions off his head. Acting completely on impulse, all he could manage was his usual teasing that slipped right off his tongue and then a bridal-style hug that had him pulling the biggest grin he’d ever done in his life.

He knew that whatever he wanted to tell Aoba would come as a shock but he wanted nothing more but to express that very intention to Aoba – for him to come over to Germany with him, to start a new life with him.

He’d had everything prepared but even so, when he sat right in front of Tae, confessing his intention to bring her one and only grandchild with him to a country thousands of miles away, he found himself facing the biggest edginess he’d ever felt in his entire life.

“I promised to take care of him.”

Probably Tae was waiting for him to say that, or probably she never expected him to say it so the moment he said that, she merely stared at him, transfixed, before she released a breath.

“Whatever you’ve decided, don’t look back.”

“It’s not compulsory,” Noiz was quick to explain. “Aoba can try out the life there first. If he doesn’t like it, he can always come back.”

“Noiz…”

But what would happen if he decided to come back, though? Noiz thought.

But the answer was obvious anyway, he’d come back with him.

His home was wherever Aoba was anyway.

He never wanted to confine Aoba. If Aoba didn’t like it, he could return anytime. Whatever Aoba wanted to do, he’d respect it. His main motive wasn’t to adapt Aoba into his lifestyle but to give Aoba a life that was comfortable enough, anyway. They could always move back to Midorijima if they wanted.

 

Life in Germany was nothing but bliss. They’d expected obstacles, having to face criticism from Noiz’s parents and societal standards that were non-existent in Aoba’s dictionary. But Aoba was tough, he was everything Noiz expected him to be. He never once backed out whenever a challenge was posed to him; he never once told Noiz that he wanted a quit. In fact, he was way stronger than Noiz could ever be and he was even grateful that Aoba was with him while he settled conflicts at home.

He took his promise with Tae seriously: to take care of Aoba. But in another way, Aoba played an important role in taking care of _him_ as well and that was when it hit him that Aoba had indeed, _promised_ him to show him the world, telling him enough of the reason why Aoba agreed to follow him to Germany – not because he wanted to obey to Noiz’s wish, but to loyally follow the promise he’d made with Noiz, to open up his world, and to allow his own world to be opened up at the same time.

 

* * *

 

 

_` “I promised to take care of you, but that’s not enough. I want to be able to give you the best as well, so… this time, I promise you that I’ll hold your hand, as **husbands** , and walk the rest of our life together.”` _

They had no guarantee whatsoever of how their life would turn out to be. They only had a path of trial and error and they could only believe in their hunches when it came to important decision making. Only time would tell how far they could go, and when it came to the moment when they were reminded and reassured that they’d made the right decision, they’d exchange gaze, then smiles, then ultimately, holding each other in their arms and telling each other that they’d still have a long way to go.

They needed no labels; they didn’t need to prove to anyone about their relationship. They were comfortable the way they were but Noiz had always been looking out for better chances to give Aoba the treatment he deserved. Aoba was his world and his world deserved the world. He wanted to give him everything he could ever afford. And even though a label was never needed, he wanted to give Aoba exactly that – to tell the world that he belonged to Aoba, and that Aoba belonged to him, just so they could walk with each other in their hands with their heads high, and just so they could give each other more promises that they would bring with them to their graves.

The proposal came as a surprise, though. Aoba had his own suspicions, and Noiz was pretty sure that he’d expected it. So when he opened the box of ring at him, Aoba pressed a finger against his lips almost instantly, stopping him from saying what he wanted to say before he took the words out of his mouth.

“I know this is coming but I didn’t expect it to be so fast,” he pouted, even though the pink smear on his cheeks wasn’t at all convincing. “But, since you’ve prepared the ring, then let me do the honour of the words.”

Noiz would let Aoba do whatever he wanted to do.

“When I first met you, I thought you were very dangerous, that I never wanted to have anything to do with you. Then, you told me you’re nineteen and it occurred to me on how… young you were. You braced this emotionless face and you seemed like you didn’t care about anything but I knew you weren’t like that. There must be something about you that I never knew that had caused you to act like that. Maybe you’re defensive, maybe something happened to you before. And when I saw how you could abandon your wounds just like that, it just… told me that I _cannot_ leave you to live like that,” he paused to catch his breath. Pulling his fingers away from Noiz’s lips, he tiptoed, rubbing their lips together before he closed his eyes, pressing their foreheads together. “You’re just a brat trying to find a place for yourself in this world. I was right about you and I’m glad that I never gave up on you even when I had all the reasons to.”

Aoba was unpredictable; it had always been Noiz’s impression towards him. Whatever Aoba had said was something Noiz had never known and it touched him deeply. Completely lost for words, he grasped onto Aoba’s shoulders, closing his eyes.

“Thank you for never giving up on me.”

Aoba, however, shook his head.

“I trusted my hunch. And now,” he looked up, gazing right into Noiz’s lime-green eyes before he broke into a cheerful grin. “I want to take another step with you, into a future both of us may not know what would lie ahead. When I look at you, I can easily see myself in you. That doesn’t mean much to most people, but it means everything to me. I never knew how I once was, but I believe that it wasn’t how you thought I’d be. You told me that you met _him_ and that you accepted him. You know, that… actually means a lot to me. I don’t know how I’ll become in the future and I don’t know how you would become either but I’m more than happy to advance into this journey with you. Are you willing to walk with me? For the rest of my life?”

Noiz nodded, kissing Aoba on the forehead, almost causing Aoba to drop tears.

“And would you,” Noiz continued, recognizing how Aoba had lost the ability for speech. “marry me? Allow me to take care of you, and allow yourself to take care of me as well, for the rest of my life?”

Aoba nodded a feverish nod, huge grin graced his features as he leaped into Noiz’s embrace, hugging him so hard it was hard to breathe.

He’d never felt the need to give anyone any assurance. He wasn’t sure if he could keep those promises either, but when he slipped the ring into his fiancé’s finger, he told himself that this was a promise he should never break, regardless of what was to happen in the future.

 

* * *

 

 

_` “My **last** promise to you is…”` _

Time was the solution to everything. No one had any control to time. It came and go; it was unpredictable. Everyone’s concept of time was different, and every circumstances defined time differently.

When they swore to accompany each other to the end of their life, they really meant it. They struggled through pains and ups and downs and they struggled through various occurrences where both of their trusts were put to test. They knew that it would never be easy for them – two brats falling in love and taking hasty steps to secure a future for each other. But it was precisely that it would never be easy that was worth the living. They had each other by their side anyway, that was the only thing that should matter to them.

They watched as their partner aged across the years, they accompanied their partner through the toughest of their life. They’d gone through new birth and loss. They’d been there when they needed each other the most. There were times when they’d returned to Midorijima, revisiting their own houses, revisiting Platinum Jail. Nothing ever stayed stagnant. Across the years, they’d witnessed how the once small town rebuilt and turned into a prominent land of its own. They witnessed how their friends picked themselves up and lived lives that were similar yet different to theirs. And regardless of what had happened throughout the year, they’d witnessed how life pushed every one of them forward, telling them to keep trying, to never be afraid of falling down over and over again, and never to give up when they shouldn’t.

They were still brats at heart and they knew about it. They fought with each other, made up, and learned from their mistakes. And when it came to a point where they could sit casually in a café downtown, minding their own businesses, sometimes reminiscing on everything that had ever happened to them, they came to realize how immature they once were, but also how they managed to keep moving forward to where they were today.

“Hey, remember the promise you told me when we first knew each other?”

They were once again back in Midorijima, sitting on the couch in the Seragaki’s household. Ever since Tae’s passing, they’d been returning more frequent than ever, just so they could keep the house occupied. They never wanted to sell the house, claiming it as their own. There were too many memories attached to this place and regardless of how long they’d been residing in a foreign country, this place would always feel most like home.

“Which one? We made a lot of promises,” Aoba chuckled. He had winter-white hair now, although speckles of blue were still obvious if Noiz ever squinted through his glasses. Wrinkled braced his skin, but yet his light-brown eyes still sparkled with the strong twinkle of light Noiz was very much familiar with.

“Remember in Heibon, when you called me over to help you out with your matter?”

“Ah, that…” Aoba tilted his head, fixing his gaze on the ceiling. “It’s so long ago but yeah, I do remember.” His voice was weak at times but the hint of sturdiness was still prominent.

“You said you would do anything I wanted if I am to help you out,” Noiz continued, encircling his arm around his husband and allowing him to cuddle in his embrace.

“That…” Aoba trailed off, closing his eyes upon finding comfort in his husband’s warmth. “Didn’t I already fulfil that promise? Our Rhyme match?”

Noiz released a barely audible sigh. He raised a hand, twirling his fingers around the fragile strands of Aoba’s gray hair before he started again,

“You promised the rematch when you scrapped me, remember?”

_` I agree to your rematch. But not only that, I want to fight you in life too.` _

Everything he said sounded like a memory from a long time ago and he wasn’t even sure if Aoba could still remember them. But Aoba nodded, his breathing slow and steady when he spoke.

“So? What do you want me to do this time, brat?”

There was something endearing with the way Aoba called him ‘brat’, even though he was far from that. He intertwined their fingers, lifting Aoba’s hand up and kissed the ring on his ring finger.

“I want you to stay alive before I could die.”

Aoba was slightly taken aback but he was quick to retort, as Noiz had expected him to.

“That’s cruel, don’t you think?” he pouted with a frown. “What do you expect me to do then when you’re dead? Do you want me to grieve over you for the rest of my life? Besides, I’m the older one, I should be dead first before you.”

He had a point, but that wasn’t what Noiz intended to express.

“We wouldn’t know until the time comes, right?” he said. The tick-tock sound of the wall clock suddenly too loud for his preference; as if he was listening to the ticking down of the remaining of their life. “But before we get to know when we’ll finally meet our end, I hope you could always have something to hold onto until time runs out for us.”

“Well, I say the same to you then,” Aoba said. He sat up, looked into Noiz’s strong lime-green gaze despite his wrinkled skin and greyish hair. “You owe me your life, don’t you ever forget that. I saved you with Scrap. You said it yourself, if it’s not because of me, you would’ve died on the roadside so technically, your life belongs to me.”

This wasn’t his point, Noiz was sure of it.

“So… I don’t allow you to die before me, you hear me? I’ll keep holding your life hostage as long as I live.”

Noiz smiled. He placed his hands on top of Aoba’s on the couch, leaning forward to kiss him tenderly on the lips.

“Looks like we’re still owing each other a lot of promises then,” he mumbled against Aoba’s lips, hot breath hitting his sensitive skin as he sent another deep kiss Aoba’s way.

“Of course. And don’t you dare say things like this again, okay? The only promise I can promise you is that I’ll keep looking after you regardless of how long you and I are to live. Even if we’re both dead and gone to Hell, I’ll still look after you.”

This was definitely too far-fetched, but Aoba’s intention had reached Noiz loud and clear. Hugging him in his arms, he kissed the top of his hair, smelling in the familiar, nostalgic scent of Aoba and merely indulging in the peaceful solitary both of them deserved.

Aoba was right. Ever since they met each other, they’d given each other so many promises that they’d lost count of them. And ever since Noiz came to know Aoba, he’d also come to understand the implication of these promises – which was to give him hope, and in return, reflect the hope on himself as well.

Because Aoba to him was his personification of hope after all, and he’d never wanted to spend his life with another person but Aoba; with or without promises.

 


End file.
